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About Krakow

So, I tried it once, right? This gal, she’s got oils smellin’ like sin—lavender, but naughty, y’know? She’s kneadin’ me, and I’m thinkin’, “Oh lordy, this is too much!” Made me happy as a clam, but—get this—kinda pissed too! ‘Cause why ain’t this a daily thing, huh? Total rip-off it’s not! Little fact for ya: them ancient Greeks, they were wild for it—called it “body worship.” Bet they’d be jealous of my gal’s skills, ha!

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First stop? The market on ul. Główna. It’s always a vibe there. Fresh veggies, loud babcias haggling over prices, and the smell of pierogi wafting through the air. I’m telling ya, if you haven’t had pierogi from that little stall by the fountain, you’re missing out. I’m standing there, drooling over the options, when suddenly, this dude bumps into me. Like, come on, man! Watch where you’re going! I spill my coffee all over my favorite shirt. Ugh, so mad!

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