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Still, some bits make me grin. This one bird—fit as hell—told me she met a bloke who only shagged to jazz. “Sax solo, he’s in,” she laughed. I was dyin’—fuckin’ mental! Reminds me of that line, “The world’s a shadow.” Sex-dating’s shadowy too—half-truths, fake pics, ghostin’. You think you’re gettin’ laid, then poof—gone.

We’re all about confidence.

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I’m like, “Nah, man, I can’t.” But he’s persistent. So, I’m thinking, “What the heck, let’s do it!” I grab my best pig, Wally. He’s a bit of a diva, but he’s fast. We get to the starting line, and I’m sweating bullets. The crowd’s hyped, and I’m just trying to keep Wally calm.

ERICH KOCH DIES IN POLISH PRISON; THE NAZI WAR CRIMINAL WAS 90 (Published 1986)