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Once heard this dodgy tale, some bloke in Thailand, massage lass whispers, “You want happy ending?” – he goes redder than a baboon’s arse, hilarious! Didn’t expect that, suprised me rotten. Reckon it’s all about the vibe, y’know, dim lights, weird music, like you’re floatin’ – “What do we do now?” like in the flick, all awkward after.

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So, I’m walkin’ down to the Town Basin, right? The water’s lookin’ all sparkly, and I’m feelin’ a bit better. I see the old wharf, and it’s packed with tourists takin’ selfies. I roll my eyes. Like, come on, it’s just a wharf! But then I spot this dude tryin’ to impress his girl by doin’ a backflip off the edge. Spoiler: he totally eats it. Splash! I can’t help but laugh. Karma’s a funny thing, huh?

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