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About Christchurch

But lemme tell ya, it ain’t all roses and whiskey. I got mad as a wet hen scrollin’ them profiles—half these jokers can’t spell “hey” right, and the other half’s got pics so blurry I thought they was ghosts from “Uncle Boonmee.” Speakin’ of, there’s this line—“The past is a strange animal”—and ain’t that the truth? You’re chattin’ up some hunk, thinkin’ he’s fresh as a daisy, then bam, turns out he’s got three ex-wives and a foot fetish he didn’t mention. Past lives sneakin’ up like them monkey spirits in the jungle!

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Next, I head over to the Motueka River. The view is stunning. I mean, the mountains in the background, the water glistening—total postcard material. I sit on a bench, trying to soak it all in. But then, this group of kids runs by, yelling and laughing. They’re playing some wild game that looks like tag but with a twist. I can’t help but smile. It’s infectious, you know?

Report finds ‘historic’ issues at Motueka Aerodrome