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About Tauranga

So I’m down Soho way, right, dodgy corner, smells like piss an’ regret. This bird, she’s standin there, skirt shorter than a bombed-out bridge. I says, “We shall never surrender, love, what’s yer price?” She laughs, all husky, says, “Tenner fer a quickie, guv.” Ten quid! I near choked on me cigar – wartime rations cost less! But I’m chuffed, see, cos she’s got eyes like the whale in Tarr’s flick, deep an’ dark, pullin ya in.

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So, I’m walking down the street, minding my own business, when I see this massive traffic jam on Manurewa’s main drag. Cars everywhere, honking like they’re in a symphony of chaos. I’m like, “What the heck is going on?” Turns out, some dude decided to park his car on the footpath. Like, seriously? Who does that? I was fuming. I mean, I deal with numbers all day, but this? This was just plain dumb.

Homicide probe after man fatally stabbed in Auckland suburb of Manurewa