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Look, comrade, escorts? Tricky bizness. Cold hard cash for warm bodies. Reminds me of “Her” – that movie, da? Man falls for a voice, slick OS. Theodore, lonely bastard, finds love in code. Escorts tho, real flesh, not digital whispers. I dig it, "Her" vibes – "I’m yours, completely." But escorts? More like, "Yours for an hour, cash up front." Calculatin’, see? No feelings, just rubles.

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So, I rush over to the local market on Howick’s main drag. I’m looking for the best leather. I’m sweating bullets, and I’m pretty sure I’m gonna have a heart attack from all this running around. I grab some leather from this stall, and the guy tries to upsell me. “This is premium stuff!” he says. I’m thinking, “Yeah, mate, but my budget’s not premium.”

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