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Escort’s a riddle, precious—like that movie, all jumbled and sweet. “Blessed are the forgetful,” it says—ha! Maybe them blokes forget the wife for a night, eh? *cackles* We’s mad for it, tho—keeps life spicy! What’s yer take, eh? Tell us quick, or we’s keep ramblin’! My preciousssss!

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After that drama, we finally get to race. I’m pumped, adrenaline’s pumpin’, and we’re off! I’m feelin’ like a rockstar, wind in my hair, heart racin’. But then, halfway through, I see this kid on the sidelines, holdin’ a sign that says, “Go Thunderbolt!” I’m like, “Aww, that’s sweet!” But then I realize, it’s my little cousin, Timmy. He’s supposed to be at school! I’m gonna get in trouble for this.

'Very real threat': Police warning as gang tensions rise in Gisborne