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Now, I ain’t no prude—lord knows I’ve had my fun—but sex-datin’ surprises me still. Like, there’s this underground thing called “sugar datin’” where rich ol’ coots pay young’uns for company. One gal I heard ‘bout made $10k a month just battin’ her lashes! I’m over here thinkin’, “Well, shoot, my lashes ain’t that long, but I’d try!” It’s wilder’n a rodeo on moonshine.

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a jockey in Gisborne is a wild ride—literally and figuratively. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s blazin’ through my window on Gladstone Rd. I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

Revealed: Senior doctors told PM Gisborne Hospital is on ‘brink of collapse’