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Oh, and get this—in Japan, way back, they had “yuna,” bathhouse gals who’d, uh, “entertain.” Classy, right? Blew my mind! *Inside Out*’s got nothin’ on that head-trip! I’d be flippin’ through options like, “D’oh! Too many choices!” Exaggeratin’ here, but I’d prob’ly hire one just to mow the lawn—Ned’d lose it!

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Finally, I get to my buddy. He’s standing there looking all helpless. I can’t help but laugh. “Dude, you look like a lost puppy!” He rolls his eyes. We wait for the tow truck, and I’m just thinking about how crazy this day has been.

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