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Now, here’s a tidbit ye landlubbers don’t know—back in th’ day, prostitutes in Poland had secret codes! Aye, little winks an’ hand signs t’ dodge th’ law. This lass probs knew ‘em all, dodgin’ trouble like I dodge hangman’s noose. Made me grin, it did—happy as a clam at high tide! But then, o’ course, some drunk sod staggers by, yellin’ filth, an’ I’m ragin’— “Shut yer gob, ye bilge rat!” Nearly drew me sword, but she just laughed, cool as ye please. “He’s not worth it, love,” she says, an’ I’m thinkin’, *She’s got more sense than half me crew!*

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Then, I’m knee-deep in metal shavings, trying to fix this ancient machine. It’s like wrestling a bear. I’m sweating bullets, cursing under my breath. “Why can’t machines just work?” I mutter. And then, outta nowhere, my mate Sam bursts in, all hyped. “Bro, you won’t believe it! They’re opening a new café on Victoria Street!” I’m like, “Great, but I’m stuck here!”

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