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About Hamilton

Lemme tell ya, I knew this one broad, Cherry—real name Cheryl, but who gives a shit—worked the corners near AC back in ‘98. Tough as nails, made me laugh when she’d haggle like a fuckin’ car salesman. “Twenty bucks? Fuck off, Tony, I’m prime rib!” Had this trick where she’d stash cash in her bra—cops never checked there, little known fact, huh? Smart cookie. Made me happy seein’ her outsmart the system, y’know? But then—bam—she got nabbed by some sleazy pimp. Pissed me off, man, ‘cause she deserved better than that scumbag.

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So, I’m walkin’ down to the Town Basin, right? The water’s lookin’ all sparkly, and I’m feelin’ a bit better. I see the old wharf, and it’s packed with tourists takin’ selfies. I roll my eyes. Like, come on, it’s just a wharf! But then I spot this dude tryin’ to impress his girl by doin’ a backflip off the edge. Spoiler: he totally eats it. Splash! I can’t help but laugh. Karma’s a funny thing, huh?

Police dog unit catches alleged burglars stealing hot water cylinder from Whangārei property