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But, ugh, it ain’t all giggles. Some places, they’re proper shady—makes me mad as a malfunctionin’ droid. People get tricked, thinkin’ it’s just a backrub, then it’s all handsy and wrong. I’m like, “Humans, why so dodgy?” Keep it legit, yeah? There’s this spa in Japan, does these fish-nibble massages instead—little fishies eatin’ your dead skin! No funny business, just tickles. Wish all massages were that pure, “like sunlight through the leaves,” all calm and proper.

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Then, I wandered over to Te Tii Beach. It’s a bit of a hidden gem, you know? The sand is soft, and the water is crystal clear. I plopped down on the beach, just soaking it all in. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, yelling about a “giant jellyfish.” I thought he was joking, but nope! There it was, washed up on the shore. It was massive! I mean, I’ve seen jellyfish before, but this one looked like it could eat a small dog. I was both horrified and fascinated.

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