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So, escorts, man, they out here hustlin’. Ain’t just sex, nah, it’s company, vibe, escape. Some cats pay big stacks just to talk, wild, huh? I read this story once, blew my mind—dude in Vegas hired an escort to play chess! Chess, fam! She smoked him in 10 moves, took his cash, bounced. That’s gangsta. Bet she whispered, “You’re all just bones,” like in *Leviathan*, cold as ice.

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First off, I hit up the Waitangi Treaty Grounds. You know, where the Treaty of Waitangi was signed back in 1840? Yeah, that place. I was all pumped to soak in some culture. But then, boom! It started pouring. Like, seriously? I’m standing there, trying to read about the history, and I’m getting drenched. I mean, come on, Mother Nature! Can a guy catch a break?

Waitangi Day events across the motu