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Oh, and the kinks! Sex-dating’s opened Pandora’s box, lemme tell ya. Chicks wantin’ ropes, dudes into feet – shit I never even dreamed of! “We defy gravity” my ass – some’a these freaks defy sanity! Had this one broad ask me to choke her – I’m like, “What, you think I’m runnin’ a waste management hit here?” Cracked me up, but I did it, and damn, it was hot.

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First stop, the local café, The Birdcage. Best flat whites in town, no cap. I’m chattin’ with the barista, Lisa. She’s got this wild hair, like a bird’s nest, but she’s cool. I order my usual, and she’s like, “You’re gonna need it today!” I’m like, “What’s up?” Turns out, there’s a big ol’ storm comin’ in. Great, just what I need.

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