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About New Plymouth

Now, I’ve had me share of rubs. One time, this lass – hands like a goddamn sorceress – starts whisperin’ sweet nothings while she’s at it. Nearly lost me mind! Happy? Fuck yeah, ‘til she charged me double – sneaky wench. Made me mad as a wet direwolf. Still, worth it. “The world is yours,” like Malik’s rise, but with less blood and more moans.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Riccarton Rd. You know the one, right? The one with the best flat whites. I’m all set to grab my caffeine fix. But guess what? The barista spills my coffee all over the counter. Like, come on! I’m not made of money! I just wanted my morning jolt, not a coffee shower. I’m standing there, fuming, while she’s apologizing like it’s the end of the world. I mean, it’s just coffee, right? But still, I’m like, “Dude, I need that to function!”

Library finally to close