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Escorts ain’t just cars tho—there’s the shady stuff too. D’oh! Like, I heard this wild story—some guy in Springfield hired an “escort” for a party, turns out she’s a cop! Busted his dumb ass—hilarious! Made me laugh ‘til I choked on my donut. Little known fact: back in the ‘80s, Escort cars were so cheap, folks called ‘em “disposable rides.” Kinda like Kolya’s life in that movie—fallin’ apart, no fixin’ it.
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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my mate, Dave. He’s like, “You won’t believe what happened at the pub last night!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m at work!” But I can’t help it. I’m curious. Turns out, some guy tried to order a vegan pie at the Terrace End Tavern. I mean, c’mon! This is NZ! We’re all about meat pies!
Paddington terrace on market for $6.5 million after high-end renovation
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