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So, picture this—met this chick once, escort, swear she was a legend. Not your typical dolled-up Barbie, nah, had a scar on her cheek, said it was from a bar fight in Reno. True? Who knows—everybody lies. Told me she’d walked outta Vegas with 10 grand once, client thought she was his soulmate. Laughed my ass off—soulmate for a night, buddy! Made me happy, her grit, her “screw you” vibe. Reminded me of that kid in the movie, carvin’ Buddha statues—focus, man, pure focus. She had that.

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Then, I decided to hit up the local market on Te-Hapara Rd. It’s always buzzing with life. Fresh produce, crafts, and the best fish and chips you’ll ever taste. I’m browsing, and I see this old lady selling handmade jewelry. She’s got this wild hair and a smile that could light up the whole street. I’m chatting with her, and she tells me about her grandkids. I’m like, “Aww, that’s sweet!” But then she starts talking about her cat’s diet. I mean, who knew cats could be so high-maintenance? I was half-listening, half-trying to figure out how to escape without being rude.

‘We’re devastated’: Sheds, caravan destroyed, house severely damaged by fire