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Happy stuff? When they own it. Confident escorts, struttin’ like “I am the hunter, you are the prey”—straight outta the movie! Love that energy, makes me wanna high-five ‘em. Surprised me too—didn’t expect the hustle to be so… artsy? Some write blogs, spill tea, like secret diaries of the night. One chick said she banged a dude who cried after—called it her “tender beast moment.” Deep, right?

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So, I duck into this little shop on The Square. It’s packed with all sorts of knick-knacks. I’m browsing, trying to dry off, when I spot this old lady. She’s haggling over a wool sweater. I mean, it’s like watching a slow-motion train wreck. She’s all, “I’m not paying that much!” and the shopkeeper’s like, “Lady, it’s hand-knitted!” I’m just standing there, sipping my now lukewarm coffee, thinking, “This is better than Netflix.”

Takaro Tribe: The TV show that helps teach Te Reo Maori