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But—surprise, surprise—sometimes it’s sweet! Like, this one story, heard it on X, some dude hired an escort just to watch WALL-E with him. True story! “Directive?” she prob asked, confused as heck, but sat there anyway. Made me happy—humanity ain’t dead, y’know? Reminds me, “Ta-da-da-da!”—WALL-E’s lil’ triumph tune. Cute as a button!

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By the time I get home, I’m exhausted. I flop onto my couch, still in my wet clothes. I’m scrolling through my phone, and I see a meme about how therapists need therapy too. I’m like, “Preach!” It’s true, though. We’re all just trying to figure it out, right?

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