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About Hastings

So, I tried it once, right? Some chick in Vienna – pro, real pro. She’s got dese moves, slippery like a snake, but gentle. Made me feel like a freakin’ king! Little secret, yeah? Dey used to do dis in ancient Rome – rich dudes got it before battles. Crazy, huh? Fought better after, swear it! I’m yellin’ in my head, “I’ll be back!” ‘Cause once ya try it, ya hooked, mate.

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I finally get my flat white, and I’m feeling good. I sit down, and out of nowhere, this kid runs past me, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and boom! Right into my table. Coffee everywhere! I’m soaked! I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” But the kid’s laughing, and I can’t help but chuckle too. Kids, man. They make everything better.

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