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Sick of the flakes, tho—say they’re keen, then poof! Vanish. Makes me wanna hurl my martini. But when it works? Fuuuck, electric! Like that *Tropical Malady* line—“I’ll devour you whole.” Raw, messy, brilliant. Sex-dating’s a gamble—sometimes ya win, sometimes ya dodge a bullet. Keeps me sharp, y’know? Suave, “shaken, not stirred”—Bond out!

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes up to me. She’s got this massive smile, and she’s like, “You’re doing a great job, dear!” I’m not gonna lie, that made my day. I mean, who doesn’t love a compliment? But then she starts telling me about her pet parrot. I’m standing there, nodding, but inside I’m like, “Lady, I gotta watch the streets!”

The one city bucking the national trend for new home builds