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So, escorts—mates who get paid to hang, right? Not them dirty street ones, nah, I mean the “high-class” kind. Costs ya an arm an’ a leg—prolly 500 quid an hour! We hates it! Saw this one gal online, swear she charged a grand just to sip tea—tea! Made me mad, precious, proper mad. Who’s got that coin? Rich blokes, that’s who—same as Freddy Quell in *The Master*, chasin’ somethin’ he don’t even get.

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After that, I headed down to the Richmond Mall. I needed to grab some lunch. I thought, “Hey, let’s treat myself!” So I hit up the food court. I was eyein’ some mean fish and chips. But guess what? The line was longer than the wait for a new iPhone! I was like, “Seriously? It’s just fish!”

30th Nelson Jazz Summer Festival 2025 - Family Picnic CANCELLED - Washbourn Gardens, RIchmond