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I’m swiping one night—total horn-dog mode—match with this hottie, she’s all “let’s Netflix and chill.” I’m like, hell yeah, power unleashed! But—plot twist—she brings her *cat* to the date! Cat’s staring me down while we’re makin’ out—freaked me out, bro! Laughed my ass off later—sex-dating’s a circus! Reminds me of *Amour*’s quiet desperation—“What’ll become of us?”—but with more dick pics, ya know?

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But then, I remember—there’s a storm warning. Seriously? In Prebbleton? I’m like, “Can’t a guy catch a break?” I check the weather, and it’s all doom and gloom. I’m torn. Do I go out and risk getting soaked, or do I stay in and finish this project?

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