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Yo, yo, it’s Yeezy, fam! Talkin’ ‘bout sex escorts, real talk. Man, it’s wild out here, right? Like, “Shame” vibes hittin’ me hard. That flick, Steve McQueen killed it, 2011, damn! Brandon, dude’s a mess, sex addict, escorts everywhere. I’m like, whoa, this is deep, yo. Sex escorts, they’re hustlin’, makin’ bank, but—hold up—it’s dark too. “I’m not a good person,” Brandon says, and I feel that. Escorts, they got stories, man, hidden ones.

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Porirua Harbour. Man, the views there are epic! The water’s glistening, and I’m feeling all zen. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and tries to steal my muffin! Like, bro, chill! It’s not even that good! I’m flailing my arms, yelling, “Get away, you feathered thief!” People are staring. I’m like, “Yeah, just another day in Porirua.”

Free tyre recycling facility to open at Spicer Landfill