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So, I’m thinkin’, right, it’s ancient—did ya know? Egyptians were all over this, usin’ oils, gettin’ freaky with it. Hieroglyphs showin’ hands slidin’—wild! Bet they didn’t have my mojo, tho. Makes me happy, man, ‘cause it’s chill, intimate, gets the blood pumpin’. But—ugh—some creeps ruin it, turnin’ it sleazy. Pisses me off! Keep it classy, shagadelic, not dodgy.

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After that, I decide to stroll down to the Parnell Village. It’s got this cute vibe, with all the shops and galleries. I pop into this little music store, and the owner, old mate Dave, is there. He’s a legend! We start talkin’ about guitars, and he shows me this vintage Fender. My heart skips a beat. I’m like, “How much?” He says, “Only a grand.” I’m like, “Only?!” I mean, I love my gear, but c’mon, I’m not made of money!

Auckland trains return to normal after two workers suffer electric shock at Parnell station