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About Hamilton

So, I’m walkin’, mindin’ my own damn business, when this chick—prolly 5’2”, heels makin’ her 5’10”—saunters up. “Hey, big guy, need company?” she purrs. I’m thinkin’, lady, I’d rather skin a bear with a spoon. “I don’t pay for that,” I grunt, deadpan as hell. She laughs, like I’m some chump. Pisses me off. Hate everything about it—fake giggles, cheap perfume stingin’ my nose. Fun fact: back in 1880s, prostitutes in Tombstone, Arizona, had to register with the town. Called ‘em “soiled doves.” Ain’t that poetic? Still stinks like desperation.

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But then, I got mad. I walked past the Ngaruawahia Sports Centre, and I saw a bunch of kids playin’ rugby. I used to play back in the day, and it hit me hard. I miss those days! I wanted to jump in and show ‘em how it’s done. But I’m not exactly in shape anymore. More like a shape, you know? Round is a shape, right?

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