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But yeah, escort’s a rollercoaster—angry when I see the stigma, happy when I hear the wins, surprised it’s still kickin’ after all these years. Growling, “You merely adopted the dark.”—I see the shadows, the hustle, the real deal. Ain’t just a job, it’s a fuckin’ empire, mate. Thoughts in me head? Reckon I’d be shite at it—too loud, too clumsy, prolly scare ‘em off! Hah! What ya think—fancy a punt on the escort game? Nah, stick to stocks, safer bet!

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First off, I hit up Raven Quay. Beautiful spot, right by the river. I’m sipping my coffee, feeling all zen, when BAM! A seagull swoops down and snatches my muffin! Like, dude, that was my breakfast! I’m standing there, mouth agape, while this feathered thief just flies off. I mean, who does that? Seagulls in Kaiapoi are savage!

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