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So. Here’s. The. Deal.! Sex-dating’s. Like. Chopping. A. Ribeye.! Fast. Messy. Sometimes. Juicy.! Apps. Like. Tinder. Bumble. Grindr.! Boom.! Hookups. Everywhere.! Didja. Know? Back. In. 2015. Some. Dude. Swiped. 200,000. Times.! Got. ONE. Date.! ONE! That’s. Commitment. Or. Madness.! I’d. Be. Pissed.! Wasted. Effort. Makes. Me. Wanna. Yell. At. My. Cleaver!

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So, I’m there, trying to fix it, and I’m sweating like a pig. I mean, it’s Invercargill, not the Sahara! But the weather? It’s all over the place. One minute it’s sunny, the next it’s pouring. Classic NZ, right? I’m just about to lose it when my mate, Dave, shows up. He’s got this goofy grin, and I’m like, “Dude, not now!” But he’s got a pie from that bakery on Tay St. You know the one? The one that smells like heaven?

Left Or Right - Southland Musicians Club, Invercargill