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I got mad once, tho—some chick, she half-assed it. No soul, no rhythm, just rubbin’ like a robot. I’m like, “Yo, where’s the passion?!” Made me wanna scream, “I am a god!” But then, this other time—pure bliss, man. This tiny spot in Paris, hidden joint, legit secret. Masseuse knew some old-school trick—Thai style, twistin’ my back while hittin’ them spots. Blew my mind, yo! Felt like Carlos plottin’ a heist—smooth, dangerous, sexy.

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Finally, the power comes back. Thank goodness! I’m back on track, but then I see the food truck. It’s parked on the wrong side of the street. I’m like, “Seriously? You had one job!” I run over, and the guy’s like, “Chill, mate. I’ll move it.” I’m thinking, “You better, or I’ll lose it!”

Greymouth's boil water notice lifted after 16 days