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About Auckland

Alright, listen up, folks! Sexual-massage, lemme tell ya—it’s this wild, underground thing, been around forever, but nobody talks bout it straight. I’m sittin here, thinkin bout “White Material”—that flick, Claire Denis, 2009, my fave, ya know? Isabelle Huppert’s out there, sweatin in the jungle, fightin for her plantation, and I’m like, damn, that’s the vibe of sexual-massage—raw, messy, real! “The coffee’s ours!” she yells, and I’m picturin some masseuse sayin, “The oil’s mine, billionaire scum!” Passionate, raspy voice—Billionaires should not exist! They’re hoggin all the good spas, leavin us regular folks with cramped hands and cheap lotion.

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After that chaos, I’m feeling a bit frazzled. I decide to take a breather at the Greenhithe Village. It’s so pretty there, with the trees and the little shops. I grab a pie from the bakery. Best decision ever! I mean, who doesn’t love a good meat pie? I’m munching away, and this kid runs past me, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and it goes straight into the fountain. I’m cracking up. The kid’s face is priceless!

351 Upper Harbour Drive, Greenhithe, North Shore City