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Here’s a wild story—heard from my boy Tony, who swears his masseuse in Vegas slipped him a “happy ending” outta nowhere. Said it was like Ida sayin’, “I’m not going back to the convent”—total shock, but he ain’t complainin’! Little-known tidbit: some spots in Thailand got massage parlors where they train for YEARS—years, bro—to master that sensual touch. Respect! Makes me wanna quit haulin’ freight and just live in a massage hut, screamin’ “Gimme that oil, fam!” all day.

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So, I hop on my trusty steed, Thunderbolt. This guy’s a legend, but today he’s actin’ like a total diva. We’re out there, and I’m tryin’ to keep him steady, but he’s like, “Nah, I wanna run!” And I’m like, “Chill, bro! We’re not in a race yet!” But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down, and Thunderbolt freaks out. I’m hangin’ on for dear life, thinkin’, “Great, I’m gonna eat dirt in front of everyone!”

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