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Ruh-roh! Me, a lifeguard, huh? Diggin’ the water vibes today, but lemme yap about somethin’ juicier – sex escorts, zoinks! Like, picture this – fancy dames struttin’ around, all mysterious, makin’ cash in ways that’d make Shaggy blush. Watched “Far From Heaven” last night – fave flick, ya know? Cathy’s all trapped in her perfect lil’ life, and I’m thinkin’, escorts? They’re breakin’ free, man! “I’m not like other people,” Cathy says, and ruh-roh, these gals ain’t either!

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But then, I see this old guy sitting on a bench. He’s feeding the ducks, and I’m thinking, “Man, that’s the life.” So, I sit next to him, and we start chatting. Turns out, he’s lived in Carterton forever. He tells me stories about the town, like how it used to be a big wool center. Wool! Can you believe that? I’m just sitting there, nodding like I know what he’s talking about.

Mayor says a person has died near Carterton New World after shooting