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Alright, so whore—yeah, that word’s a freakin’ mess, right? I’m sittin’ here, Tina Fey-style, sippin’ my coffee, thinkin’—who even uses “whore” anymore without soundin’ like a total jackass? I can see Russia from my house, and even they’re like, “Nah, too outdated!” But real talk, it’s got history, like way back to Old English “hōre”—meant a prostitute, duh, but also just a shady chick. Wild, huh? Kinda makes me mad how it stuck around to slap women down, like, can we not?

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But then, just as I was getting into it, my phone buzzed. It was my boss. Ugh. He wanted me to cover a last-minute shift at the office. I was like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a flash mob!” But he didn’t care. So, I had to bail on the dance party. Major bummer.

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