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But here’s the kicker—some numpties botch it. Slippery fools slap oil on, no skill, no soul—pisses me off! Done right, it’s therapy, mate—mental, physical, the lot. Done wrong? You’re a greasy mess, £50 down, fuming. Seen blokes brag online—X posts full of “happy endings”—grow up, you wankers! It’s deeper than that, not just a cheap thrill.

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So, I grab my coffee and head outside. The sun’s shining, and I’m feeling good. I decide to take a stroll down to the Bishopdale Park. It’s a nice spot, with those big trees and the playground. I see some kids running around, and it hits me – I miss being a kid. No worries, just fun. But then, I see this kid throw a tantrum. Like, full-on meltdown mode. I’m talking screaming, crying, the works. I can’t help but laugh. It’s like, “Dude, chill! You’ll get your ice cream!”

Elephant slide inspires children's book