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Oh, and get this—some say it heals shit. Like, old Chinese docs used it—energy flow, chi crap. Dunno if it’s true, sounds dope tho. Me, I’m just picturin’ it—layin’ there, lights low, hands everywhere. “You’re my life,” like in *Amour*—that’s the vibe it hits. Fuckin’ poetic, right? But don’t overdo it—once I cramped up, hilarious disaster! Tony don’t limp, man, embarrassing as hell.

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I get to the flat, and it’s a total mess. The landlord’s there, all smug, thinking he can just push people around. I’m like, “Nah, mate. Not happening.” We get into it, and I’m feeling my blood boil. I mean, who does he think he is? I’m ready to throw down, but I keep it cool. Gotta be professional, right?

Gang funeral procession blocks roads, motorbikes ridden on footpaths, witness says