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Sometimes it’s chill, tho. Soft music, candles, hands grazin’ ya—makes ya feel like a king. Other times? Sketchy as hell—had a buddy say he got a “massage” and the cops raided the joint mid-rub! He’s yellin’, “I just wanted a backrub!” Hilarious, but damn, that’s a mood-killer. Surprised me how shady it can get—keeps ya on ya toes.

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Finally got my pie, and it was worth it. Flaky pastry, juicy filling—heaven! But then, as I was walking back to the car, I tripped over a curb. Like, seriously? I looked like a total klutz. Some old lady laughed at me. I just waved it off, but inside, I was like, “Ugh, why me?”

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