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Oh, and get this – some escorts reckon they’re therapists too. Not even jokin’! Bloke pays for a bit of fun, ends up sobbin’ about his ex. “Feelings are a shadow”, she’d whisper, nickin’ that In the Mood vibe, and he’s hooked. Surprised me, that – thought it’d be all wham-bam, but nah, it’s deep, messy, real.

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After the rain let up, I decided to explore more. I wandered down to the Molde Cathedral. It’s this beautiful building, all white and majestic. I just stood there, taking it all in. But then, I saw a group of kids playing soccer nearby. They were kicking the ball around, having a blast. I thought, “Man, I miss being a kid.” So, I joined in. Yeah, I played soccer in my fish shirt. I’m sure I looked ridiculous, but who cares?

Shamrock Rovers’ European dream ends in agonising penalty shootout defeat against Molde