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Find one? Easy, yet not. Apps now, bro—tech’s wild! X posts, shady links, “massage” ads—ha, sure, “massage.” Look sharp, you must—cops sting sometimes. Exaggerate, I will: one time, chick said, “Yoda, you’re hot!” Liar, she was—green skin, not sexy. “The cart stops, the horse trembles”—that’s me, nervous, picking wrong spot. Laugh, I did, at my dumbass self. Spill the tea, I say—watch, learn, don’t rush. Fun? Maybe. Risky? Hell yeah. What think you, padawan?

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After that, I head over to the old church on Håkon V’s gate. It’s beautiful, but I’m feeling kinda weird. Like, I’m a texture artist, right? I’m always looking at surfaces, colors, and patterns. But today, I’m just staring at this church, thinking, “Why can’t I make textures this epic?” I mean, the stonework is insane! I’m getting all inspired, but also frustrated. Ugh!

The carnage above the West Coast of Norway: Mossies on the Attack