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About Trondheim

Me, I’d be rubbish at it—hands shakin’ like I’m on stage, screamin’ “Paranoid.” Probs drop the oil, slip on it, arse over tit! “Sharon!” I’d holler, but she’d just roll her eyes. Thing is, it’s all about vibes, innit? Slow, steamy, like levelin’ up in *Boyhood*—takes ages, but worth it. “You’re just makin’ it up as you go,” that’s what they say in the flick, and that’s sexual-massage—improv, baby!

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After that, I’m back to the grind. I’m trying to rally the troops, and I’m like, “Let’s do this!” But then, someone spills coffee all over the floor. I’m just standing there, mouth agape, thinking, “Is this a comedy show?” I mean, come on!

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