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So, real talk—sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs. It’s old as hell—think ancient Rome, orgy vibes, oil everywhere, freaky senators gettin’ DOWN. Little-known fact: Russia’s got this underground scene—babushkas whisperin’ about “special massages” in Soviet bathhouses, like, “Comrade, relax… but SEXY.” I’m fuckin’ HYPED diggin’ into this—history’s wild, man! Makes me wanna scream—WHY DIDN’T I KNOW THIS SOONER?!

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Then, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Yo, let’s hit up the pub later.” I’m down! But first, I gotta check out the view from the top of Steinsfjellet. It’s a hike, but totally worth it. The view of the fjord is insane! I’m standing there, feeling on top of the world. Then, I realize I’m late for the pub. Classic me, always losing track of time.

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