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She funny too, in a triflin’ way. Always braggin’ ‘bout her “skills” with the fellas—girl, please! You ain’t no prize, you a participation trophy! I cackle every time she start talkin’. But real talk, she a survivor, like Viggo Mortensen fightin’ them goons. “I’m the only one who can keep this family together,” Tom said—whore prolly think that ‘bout herself too, holdin’ court with her crew.

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So, I’m fuming, but whatever. I stroll down to the waterfront. The view’s sick, man. The fjord sparkles like diamonds. I’m feelin’ a bit better. Then, BAM! A seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich right outta my hand! I’m like, “Dude, that’s my lunch!” But the bird’s just like, “Nah, bro, it’s mine now.” I’m ready to throw hands with a bird.

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