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About Nijmegen

Ever tried it? Me neither—ha! But reckon it’s wild. Warm oil, dim lights, slow moves—gets ya tingly, don’t it? Heard this story—some lass in Paris, paid 200 euros for a “tantric” sesh. Lasted 3 hours, she said it was like floatin’—mental! “Stupid, fat hobbit!”—he’d call it dirty, but it’s class, pure class! Bet it beats scrollin’ X all day.

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First off, I wake up late. Classic me. Alarm? Nah, it decided to take a day off. So, I’m scrambling, throwing on whatever I can find. I mean, who needs matching socks anyway? Not me! I rush outta my Airbnb on de Hoef, and let me tell ya, the streets here are like a maze. I’m dodging bikes like I’m in some twisted video game. Seriously, these Dutch cyclists are like ninjas.

"In addition to supplying sauerkraut in buckets, we now also offer it in 50-gram cups"