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About Eindhoven

Sexual-massage joints—half of ‘em are fronts. Rubdowns turnin’ into somethin’ else, real quick. I hate it. Makes my skin crawl, not cause I’m prude—nah, I’m a man’s man—but the lies? Disgustin’. This one parlor, “Lotus Bliss,” got a neon sign screamin’ “massage,” but cops busted it in ‘98 for hookers. Little known fact—owner paid off the mayor, stayed open. Slimeballs. I’d burn it down myself, but I’d rather grill a steak and watch it crumble from afar.

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Finally, I get in, and it’s cool. I’m learning about the history of the Zaan region, and it’s fascinating. But then, I see this exhibit about the industrial revolution, and I’m like, “Wow, this is kinda boring.” I mean, I get it, but can we spice it up a bit? Maybe throw in some explosions or something?

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