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Oh, and the drama—gawd, it’s juicy. Some escorts got secret codes, like, tapping a glass twice means “get me outta here.” Little known fact, babe! Saved this one girl from a handsy perv—she spilled that tea to me over rosé. I was, like, “Genius, why don’t I have a code?” Maybe I do—tossing my hair’s my “Kris, save me” signal.

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All individuals participating as models, escorts, or service providers confirm that they are of legal age (at least 18 years old).

Then, I get a call from my boss. He’s like, “We need to talk about the new line.” I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need.” I’m trying to focus, but the music is blasting, and I can’t hear a thing. I’m like, “Can you repeat that?” And he’s all, “We need more color!” I’m like, “Dude, it’s Wolvega! It’s colorful enough!”

Dutch Chef wins the prestigious 55th annual Taittinger culinary prize