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Here’s the kicker—fun fact: in Poland, where *Ida*’s from, prostitution’s legal but pimping ain’t. Wild, right? So I’m thinkin’, why’s this gal here, not there? ‘Cause America’s a damn magnet for dreamers—and crooks! I tell her, “You’re worth more than this!” She laughs—says, “Tell that to my landlord, commie!” Ha! Commie—me! I’m dyin’, folks, she’s a riot.

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Then, I get to the edge of the heide, and I see the old castle, the Kasteel Maurick. It’s stunning! I’m snapping pics like a tourist. But then, I hear this loud noise. Turns out, it’s a bunch of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking the ball around, and one of them accidentally sends it flying right at me. I duck just in time, but man, my heart was racing! I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But they just laugh. Kids, man. They’re fearless.

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