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Met this lass once, escort, sharp as a tack. Said, “Boris, I choose this, pays me uni.” Fair dos, I thought, *carpe diem*! She was no *Ida*, all pure ‘n’ silent. More like, “I’ve seen it all, mate.” Reckoned she’d outsmart half the Cabinet. Laughed my arse off when she said, “Politicians are my best punters!” Cheeky mare, loved that. *Ida* vibes again – “What’s God’s plan here?” None, probs. Just cash and a giggle.

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While Jan’s tinkering, I start prepping dough for my famous appeltaart. You know, the one that makes people weep with joy? I’m mixing, kneading, and then—oh snap! I spill flour everywhere. It’s like a snowstorm in the bakery. I’m covered in white powder, lookin’ like a ghost.

NS to run even more trains next year, starting earlier and ending later on many routes