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Me, I’d be crap at it—evil lairs don’t need massages, just minions screamin’. But those pros? They got skills, man. “A touch reveals,” like in the movie—every rub’s got intent, y’know? Exaggeratin’ here, but one wrong squeeze and bam—ya paralyzed! Ok, not really, but feels like it when they hit that spot.

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After that, I’m feeling a bit better, so I stroll down to the Spangenpark. It’s a chill spot, you know? Kids are playing, dogs are running around. I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and spills his ice cream all over me. I’m like, “Seriously?!” I’m covered in chocolate and sprinkles. I look like a walking dessert.

10-Day Weather Forecast for Spangen, South Holland, Netherlands - The Weather Channel | weather.com