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Sometimes it’s a thrill, tho. You match with someone hot, heart’s racin’, you’re all, “Mmm… donuts,” ‘cause it’s sweet! Then you meet, and it’s either fireworks or a total dud. Like, one time, I heard this story – guy matched with a gal, drove two hours, she ghosted him at the diner! “Don’t leave me alone!” he prob’ly yelled, straight outta that flick! Pissed me off just hearin’ it – what a jerk move!

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But then, the waiter spills water all over Jan. I’m cracking up, and Jan’s just sitting there, looking like a wet dog. He’s not amused. I’m like, “C’mon, man, it’s just water!” But he’s sulking.

Finalists for School of Ocean and Earth Science and Technology dean announced