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Back in “Stories We Tell”—ooh, my fave—Sarah Polley digs into secrets, right? Family mess, hidden flings—sex-dating’s kinda that! “We’re all just stories,” she says, nasal snort. Everyone’s hidin’ somethin’ on those apps. This one time, my cousin Patty—oh, lordy—she matched some sleaze. Guy showed up with a ferret—*a ferret*! Said it was his “wingman.” I’m like, “Hmm… that’s a dealbreaker, mister!” Laughed ‘til I cried, swear it.

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As the day winds down, I’m packin’ up, and I hear this commotion. Turns out, there’s a boat parade on the canal! I mean, how cool is that? I drop my stuff and run to the water. It’s like a mini carnival! People are laughin’, music’s pumpin’, and I’m just standin’ there, grinnin’ like an idiot.

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