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What shocked me? Some dude on X bragged ‘bout bangin’ 50 chicks in a month off these apps. Fifty! I’m like, “Oh my God, wash yerself!” Prolly lyin’, but still—gross. Made me wanna scrub my eyes with bleach. Hmmm… folks get wild out there. Me, I’d rather stick with Homer’s lazy lovin’—at least I know the mess I’m in!
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But then, outta nowhere, it started pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m sprinting down the street, trying to find shelter. I ducked into a shop on de Hoofdstraat. It was a tiny place, but they had the best vintage stuff. I was browsing, and I found this old record. It was like a treasure! I was so hyped, I forgot about the rain.
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